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Bridal Meltdown #1

April 9, 2009

I suppose it had to happen. The bigger question is how many more times will it happen?

My semester is INSANE. I’ll be done in the middle of May, but until then I have no time to breath, sleep, or socialize, must less time to plan my wedding. I can only do very basic things. Like my guest list and buy invitations and get a photographer. Those things I can do. I’ve pushed off the flowers to my sister, Katie, and my Aunt Dom. Food will be taken care of my my ridiculously talented family. About a week ago I was spazzing about getting everything done in time and mother informed me of two things.

#1 Most of her planning was done during the last month

#2 It’s my wedding. I can have the traditions I want. I can throw out what I don’t want. I can invite who I want and cut who I want. In the end, I get that final call on all aspects. The only person higher than me is the minister.

Of course, I don’t want to throw out the canary with the cage (did you like that new cliche there?) on that second point. I don’t want to be a bridezilla or forget that the service is first and foremost a worship experience. It does mean that I don’t have to make choices that make me straight upset. I do not have to have a cake. I can have cupcakes. I do not have to have a traditional Anglican wedding. It can be blended. I can top my guest list at 200 and I can say these are the hymns that I want.

I already bent on something I was dead set on, and it’s made a ripple of changes through the wedding. It’s made me incredibly unhappy, but I can’t change it now.

I should state this is not my dream wedding. This is not even my daydream wedding from doodling in class as a 16 year old dreaming of Adam King. No, this is my I-don’t-even-have-the-money-for-a-photographer-or-invitations wedding. The only thing that is even somewhat satisfactory is the color. That I got. So, excuse me if I want to have a few things my way.

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